Relationships seem to come and go quicker these days with dating apps, websites, and technology at our fingertips. It can be hard to know what to do when he disappears.
Sometimes, he hasn’t disappeared at all, he’s not as responsive as you’d like him to be, and other times it can be straight ghosting.
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What Is Ghosting And How Do You Avoid It?
Ghosting is when someone whom you have feelings for, and assume they reciprocate those feelings, disappears from your life completely.
It could be a friend, someone you’ve been on a few dates with or someone you’ve been dating long term.
Why Do People Ghost?
People who ghost usually want to avoid the emotional downfalls of breaking up with another person.
They don’t feel like they can confront another person and deal with the emotions that come with letting another person down. Those people who ghost have more often than not been ghosted before.
Is Ghosting Healthy?
Psychologists note that being ghosted by a friend or romantic partner can be really difficult.
It can be hard for the person who has been ghosted to move on to another partner because they are confused as to why their partner disappears.
What Are The Signs Of Being Ghosted?
There may be signs that someone is about to ghost you. Do not believe him if he is constantly telling you that he is too busy.
If he’s interested in a relationship with you, then he’s going to clear out his schedule for you. One thing that may be able to help avoid being ghosted is to keep your man on his toes.
How Do You Keep A Guy On His Toes?
Men can get bored in a relationship really quickly. Hence, women need to keep their interest, just as they should try to keep your attention.
Do your best to keep things exciting and stay out of a relationship rut. Don’t go out to the same bars or restaurants, try new places, and go on adventures.
Stay interesting to him by choosing which information to share and when. It can be hard not to gush and tell your new man everything about yourself, but when dating, do your best to withhold some things about yourself.
He’s likely to want to know more about you when he hasn’t learned it all within the first few dates.
Do your best not to be a push over. If you are always saying that you’re sorry for something or are overly nice, a man is less likely to take things seriously and is more likely to disappear.
In addition to not being too nice, you’ll want to keep things casual and funny.
Most men are attracted to a woman who can make him laugh. Relax, enjoy the time you have together and don’t take dating too seriously.
Women typically want a man to be exclusive in a relationship. Take your time to get to this point. Trust him, and don’t pressure him.
Giving your man space will increase the chances of developing a long-lasting connection. Telling yourself that you need to be together or in communication with each other constantly is misleading and wrong.
By being relaxed in a relationship, you are going to make him want to keep the relationship moving forward.
To ensure you’re not pushy, try your best to keep from bombarding him with constant texts and phone calls. It’s okay for him to reach out to you.
If you don’t over-communicate with him, he may be curious as to what you’re up to.
When you stay intriguing, calm, and relaxed, your man is going to want to continue to take the time to get to know you.
This will lessen the chances that he just up and disappears. It can also help if his personality leans towards the emotionally unavailable side of the spectrum.
How Do You Connect With An Emotionally Unavailable Man?
If you are with a man who seems emotionally unavailable, there are things that you can do to help the relationship.
Make sure to help him so he’d know what you need from him. It is important, however, to understand the difference between emotionally unavailable versus a toxic relationship.
What Should I Do If I’m In a Toxic Relationship?
If you are in a toxic or bad relationship with an emotionally unavailable man, you should focus on yourself first and foremost.
You should not feel forced to stay in an abusive relationship (physically abusive, verbally abusive, emotionally abusive, or others) no matter what.
When you find yourself in a bad relationship, and you feel like it’s time to let go, do not let him encourage you to stay.
If, however, you are in a relationship with an emotionally unavailable man that is not toxic, there are a few things that you can try before everything sours.
There are ways to connect with an emotionally unavailable man so long as you’re willing to put in the effort and the work. It may not always be easy, but if you feel that it’s worth it, then there’s no harm in trying.
What Can I Do To Connect With My Emotionally Unavailable Man?
If your man is emotionally unavailable, it does not necessarily mean it’s time to move on and get back in the dating scene. There are ways for you to date and to love an emotionally unavailable man.
One of the very first things you should do is to let him know what you need from him. What fulfills your needs?
Do you need to go on a date every so often, do you need him telling you how much he needs you in his life, do you need him to initiate the first move?
Keep all lines of communication open as best you can, especially when he’s willing to listen.
Do your best to be open and honest with him. Remember, too, that you should not try to change the way he is.
If he is already emotionally unavailable, he is probably not likely to open up, and he is more likely to disappear. Accept the way he is and understand where he is coming from.
Sometimes, it is not easy to date a man who is emotionally unavailable. Still, women are able to date these men successfully if they try.
One of the best pieces of advice is to be realistic with yourself and with your expectations of him. It is unlikely that he will change, so you may need to change your expectations of life with him.
The next thing that you should focus on while dating a man who is really distant is to be patient with your man. It can be challenging at times; however, he will appreciate it more than he shows it to you.
If, or when, he disappears, do your best to get back on track by managing your emotions, communicating clearly, and handle the situation like adults.
No man wants to feel as if he is dating a nagging version of his mother when he needs time to himself.
Some things can be done if you feel that your man is pulling away, whether you two are just dating or if you’re more established.
See Also: What to Do When a Man Opens Up to You Emotionally
What Should You Do When He Is Pulling Away?
As mentioned earlier, have patience with your man, even if you think he is pulling away from you. Life may be getting in the way, but don’t panic.
One thing that guys do when life gets in the way is to pull back from stressful situations. If he thinks that his life is more stressful with you in it, he may want to disappear or pull away from you.
Again, give him space, but ensure that he knows you are there for him if he needs you. Feel free to point it out and tell him how it makes you feel when he disappears for days at a time.
If he disappears for a few days, feel free to check in with him, but do your best not to pressure him.
If he disappears for an extended length of time, he may be preparing both of you for a breakup.
See Also: What to Do When He Reappears – Coping with Guys Who Mess with Your Head
Do Guys Come Back After They Dump You?
After a man dumps you, it can feel like you’ve suddenly lost a part of yourself.
Sometimes there is closure, while other times, there is not. If you know what happened, remain strong. Some men will realize their mistake, give excuses for their behavior, and try to get back with you.
Be ready for either situation. Some guys always try to get back together, while others might sign out ultimately.
In either case, this can be very emotional for you. Do your best to keep enough space between the two of you so that neither of you gets overwhelmed.
You may need to cut back on your messages or online communication.
If you decide that you want to get back together, then you need to make sure you fully understand why he ended things in the first place, and what needs to happen.
That way, the two of you can move forward without feeling like you’re giving in or giving up.
