So, you’re a sapiosexual, and you want to know how to attract an intelligent man? You’re not alone.
Intelligent women want a man who can carry on a coherent conversation. They also like a man that is someone that is not limited to bad dad jokes and farts and grunts.
Okay, that may sound a little harsh, but if you’re a smart woman, you know how hard the hunt is for a man with brains and brawn.
Table of Contents
How to attract an intelligent man?
- Go where intelligent men go
- Take up a night class
- Trust your instincts
- Don’t lie about your intelligence
- Be proud of your own achievements
- Give the man his moment
For some women, a man’s mind is the most attractive part of him. Yes, don’t get me wrong, we like to see you flex your biceps.
However, it’s that brain flex that turns us on the most. Read on to find out how you can get yourself a man with so many brains, the conversation turns into foreplay.
1. Go Where Intelligent Men Go
Intelligent men are interested in more than just going clubbing or pumping iron at the gym.
If you’ve had no luck finding a smart guy at the club, maybe you should venture out a little. Go to the library, visit a museum or gallery, or go see a live performance at the theater.
Men with high IQs appreciate culture and art as a form of beauty and as a gateway to more knowledge. You’re more likely to meet an attractive and smart man you’re attracted to in these environments.
Intelligent men like spending time learning. As a smart woman yourself, that does not always mean being stuck behind a book.
2. Take Up A Night Class
What better way to catch the attention of a smart guy than by showing that you’re intelligent too?
Remember, intelligent guys, are looking for girls who can engage in interesting conversations. You want to attract a brainy man, and the chances are he is looking for someone who will keep him on his toes.
But, don’t just choose any subject; look for something that really interests you.
That way, if you meet the intelligent man of your dreams there, you know you have something in common and this will make starting off a conversation so much easier.
3. Trust Your Instincts
First impressions should not be ignored. Although it may not be a good idea to make too quick a judgment, you should trust your gut.
People who are insensitive or rude most likely aren’t very emotionally smart and may lack in the brain department too.
You can be sure that men of above-average intelligence will be more sensitive to your emotions. Doesn’t that make then super attractive?
4. Don’t Lie About Your Intelligence
If you don’t know what someone is talking about, don’t pretend that you do even if you’re trying very hard to attract a smart man. If you fake knowledge, you will eventually get caught in a lie, and that is not going to help your cause.
Also, a smart man will appreciate you asking questions. It not only gives him a shot to show off his knowledge but also demonstrates your thirst for knowledge, which is something men find sexy.
You’re not going to be judged when you don’t know something, and should someone even try, they’re not very intelligent, are they? Take a look at point 3 again if you don’t know the answer.
5. Be Proud Of Your Achievements
Dust of those trophies, hun! It doesn’t matter how big or small, show off your skills. Intelligent guys like it when women brag about the things they’re good at and achieved.
Being proud of yourself is a good thing and a smart guy will end up feeling proud of you too because he understands that knowledge is one of those things you should take pride in.
6. Give Him His Moment
When a guy likes you, he will try to impress you. Give him space to go for it! If he wants to tell you about an important business meeting he had at the restaurant you’re at, listen with a smile.
You will have time to share your story later, but for now, sit back and take in the information he is sharing about himself and show him you’re impressed.
Ask questions to show him that you’re interested and want to know more about his accomplishments.
After he had his moment, you can shine by sharing things you have in common or talk about something you achieved and are proud of.
Now that you have six tips on how to attract an intelligent man let’s look at the reasons why a brainy man can beat a brawny one in the contest for your heart (even though popular culture portrays intelligent men as single loners).
Of course, if they’re smart and sexy, go out of your way to make that man yours!
Why Do Women Like Intelligent Men?
Smart women want men who can connect with them on an intellectual level.
Although physical chemistry is very important, for women who crave intelligence, they need to be able to feel that the guy’s IQ is on the same (or even a little higher) level than hers.
She wants an intellectual equal who can keep her captivated without relying on pure physical attraction.
Intelligent men can talk (and think) about more than just sex
What they say and how they say it makes brainy guys super attractive.
You’ve seen this in romcoms; boy meets girl, they have a connection, but instead of flirting and having sex the whole night, they have in-depth discussions about anything and everything until the sun comes up.
This builds a stronger bond and will make having sex much more intimate.
Women are attracted to men they can admire, and a bright mind is admirable.
We like to feel proud of our partners. Brainy men that can wow a person with their general knowledge are sexy, and women can’t help but marvel at their intelligence.
Some women’s sexual attraction starts in mind and an intelligent guy will be able to entice a brainy woman’s mind
This builds on the previous points; if you’re a sapiosexual, just listening to a guy share what he knows about some or other obscure topic is enough to turn you on.
Smart men tend to be passionate about what they’re interested in. That passion is the ultimate aphrodisiac for women who like men with brains.
Smart guys have a hunger and passion for knowledge
And women know the guys will use the same desire and passion to get to know them and their bodies.
It’s also highly likely that smarter men know the female body better than their less-intelligent equivalents, which is a big reason why women may prefer the intellectuals among the opposite sex.
Women are more than just sexual beings
Women are spiritual, social, creative, intellectual, and complicated – yes, we own it.
A smart man will be able to see her various layers and get to know her on all levels. Intelligent guys have an advantage here because they usually have multiple layers of interest that may overlap with hers.
For example, she may be artistic and loves painting. At the same time, he is interested in the old masters like da Vinci or Rembrandt. Voila, an instant connection and lots to talk about!
Intelligent men inspire growth, and this is something women appreciate.
When you’re in a relationship, you want your partner to build you up and encourage you to grow as a human being.
Since smarter guys have more emotional intelligence and are more self-assured in general, they will be more likely to root for you without fear of you surpassing them and making them feel small.
It’s easy for a smart woman to talk to a brainy guy.
A conversation of high quality will help amplify sexual intimacy. Have you ever tried having a meaningful discussion with someone who isn’t on the same intelligence level as you?
It’s painful, to say the least, and you find yourself explaining yourself more than being understood. Brainy guys snap things quickly and have the ability to understand women on a deeper level, and that understanding is super hot.
Smart guys can use their face, eyes, and demeanor to talk.
One intense look and a woman will feel like the earth is moving.
Yep, they don’t need words to communicate because they know enough about the world and social cues to just use body language to convey what they think and or want from you.
You’ve experienced it, I’m sure, that lingering stare with his mouth curling into a slight smile just at the corners. He didn’t need to walk over to you and say, ‘Hey girl, I like you. Can I buy you a drink?’ You just knew it.
Intelligent men are usually confident
That confidence means we feel his presence when he walks into a room even if the room is full.
Smart women can’t help but want to be surrounded by such chemistry. Also, people will be hanging on his lips in no time listening to him share his knowledge, and who doesn’t want to be at the side of a guy that is so popular?
It will be a confidence booster of note to be the one he chose as a girlfriend.
Why Do We Prefer Intelligent Partners?
Intelligence comes down to being mentally grown-up and is not limited to book-smarts – it’s also about being wise, respectful, and attentive in a relationship.
If you ask Diana Rabb, a Ph.D. in transpersonal psychology, she won’t think twice before telling you that the brain is the largest sex organ.
As sapiosexuals, a discussion about philosophy, politics or psychology, or any intellectual topic they’re interested in is an excellent way to turn on the heat. Some even see it as foreplay. Intelligence will get women who are attracted to smart men hot and bothered, especially if it involves a good debate that will help her see things from a different angle.
What Do The Other Experts Say?
Psychologists Gilles Gignac, Joey Darbyshire, and Michelle Ooi of the University of Western Australia argue that there is a particular IQ score that makes you sexually attractive.
The study, Some People Are Attracted Sexually To Intelligence: A Psychometric Evaluation of Sapiosexuality explains that if you are sapiosexual, you don’t have to be intelligent yourself. It just means you find brainy men or women way hot!
Another interesting fact is that women who prefer smart men (and vice versa) don’t value intelligence because of the accompanying benefits you may get like a better career or income project. They like someone smart purely because brainpower is a turn-on.
However, it seems that there is a thing as ‘too smart.’ If a person’s IQ goes above a specific number, attraction declines. You must be wondering what the magic number is? Well, that depends on if you’re looking for a one-night stand or a long-term relationship?
If you said a serious relationship, then you’re looking at an IQ of 120 as the most sexually attractive.
When it comes to casual sex, things get a little blurry, but one thing is for sure, guys will settle for someone with an IQ 15 points below that of what a woman will pay for. Think about that for a moment.
That being said, when 10 000 people from 33 countries were asked what the most valued characteristics in their perfect mate are, intelligence came in second, after kind and understanding.
So, intelligence is something that men and women want when their relationship takes a more serious turn.
If you’re still in the ‘bicep over brains’ camp, below are two interesting points that might sway you to the smart side.
The smarter the man, the stronger the sperm
If you’ve been looking for tips on how to attract men of higher than average intelligence, there’s an evolutionary reason behind it: brainy men have good swimmers.
Research from the University of Mexico found a direct link between a man’s virility and his intelligence. They tested the sperm of 400 men after some grueling mental testing.
The men with higher IQs had healthy and strong sperm. So, basically, if you are a woman, your ovaries can sense intelligence, and that is why you are more attracted to someone intelligent.
After all, to make babies, you need strong sperm, and by making the smart choice (pardon the pun), you are more likely to get pregnant that way.
High intelligence, high sex drive
If you’re a highly sexual woman, you’ll be happy to read that the smartest men are also the most sexual. A sex toy company did some research and found that students from ‘elite’ universities bought toys more frequently.
Now, doesn’t that just help you feel more attracted to smart guys?
Homework For A Smart Woman Looking For A Smart Man
You should by now have realized that smart guys will most likely be attracted to smart women when things take a serious turn relationship-wise. That means one of your biggest advantages in attracting men is your brain!
Fact: smart, confident men are attracted to smart, confident women. And dumb and insecure men will run for the hills when confronted with a brainy woman.
So, keeping that in mind, the secret to how to attract a man and a smart one at that, lies in your ability to thrill him with your brain. A sure-fire way to catch his attention is by telling him a little bit more about yourself during your conversation.
For example, don’t just say, ‘I have two degrees in math.’ Follow it up with a ‘because.’
Actually, just adding that one word and the explanation that follows will show him, you’re one smart cookie and someone who can match his intellect.
It will intrigue him and stimulate his mind and will make him ask questions to get to know you better. That is a good thing when you’re looking to attract a smart man.
Practice adding because of your sentences, and it will lead to deeper and more meaningful conversations.
A quick recap: as a smart and accomplished woman, you may wonder how to attract men with brains that actually think brainy women are good relationship material.
Well, while some men may prefer less ‘demanding’ women, you do get guys with ‘smart’ at the top of his list of must-haves that makes a woman perfect.
To attract one, you have to go to their water hole and actually find someone you are interested in. Once you’ve met, listen to your gut. If he is rude or impolite, the chance is high that he is not very smart.
If you two hit it off, be yourself. Don’t lie about how smart you are or about what you know. Honesty is a building block of any relationship, and you don’t want to get caught out in a lie.
Next, be proud of what you’ve achieved in your life – no matter how small. Men find women who brag (in a non-arrogant way) sexy.
That being said, don’t make the whole night about you. Let him tell you about what he’s achieved and ask questions that show that you’re interested in his intellectual pursuits.
Just a quick word of caution. Don’t try to compete with a guy when you’re on a date. Even though you may want to show off your smarts, do it in a non-confrontational way like listed above.
Usually, the guy just wants to relax and have a fun time with you. If it turns into a mental wrestling match, you won’t hear from him again. If you do, it will be in a ‘buddy let’s hang’ kind of way.
Now that you know how to attract an intelligent man, ask a few of your girlfriends out on an evening of intellectual pursuits. Who knows, maybe all of you will get lucky in a sapiosexual way.
Of course, share this article with the girls before hitting the streets. They also need to know how to attract men of higher than average intelligence if they hope to be successful!