So, you made the first move, and you successfully got one of your dreams to not only like you enough for a first date, but agree to see you a second time.
Well done! However, now is usually the time where that initial get-to-know-you stuff has been conquered. It is time for second date questions that will continue the spark.
That second date is the doorway between ice- breaker and a prospective relationship – not a place to tread recklessly.
Luckily, we’re here to help with some second date questions you can ask that will hopefully open the door and invite the person back on a third date.
First off, once tip: let curiosity lead you when it comes to questions to ask on a date.
Of course, this is a bit scary if you don’t know exactly how to approach the second date, but it helps to prepare for it with a few predetermined questions.
This will not only take away some of the stress that leads to those sweaty palms, but it will also help you get to know your date.
After all, this is a person you are very interested in. So feel free to ask all the dating questions you want to, but remember one thing: don’t turn it into an interrogation.
Table of Contents
What does a second date mean?
As I mentioned before, treat the second date as nothing more than a more comfortable first date. Do not assume that it is a definite green light to your date’s heart, but make sure that you both enjoy it casually.
No need to stress too much about what to wear or how to behave on a second date. The person liked you enough to want to see you again!
Second dates are supposed to be fun, so reading too much into it might spoil the mood. This is the time when both of you should be comfortable enough to get a bit deeper into what you expect from your budding relationship.
Find out what you have in common as far as expectations go by selecting just the right questions to ask when dating.
What questions do you ask on a second date?
Although a date should not turn into a game of twenty questions, it is important to get information about your date’s likes and dislikes to see how much you two have in common.
It helps to have some specific questions in mind, to know which questions to ask through small talk, mostly.
Keep it casual, but make sure that you ask those things you really want to know. But remember one thing, your date will also want you to share more about yourself, so be prepared to answer what you ask her.
The best rule of thumb to follow is to focus on the key parts of anyone’s life; what makes them who they are? With a few light touches on the right questions, you can quickly get to know your date without sounding inappropriate or pushy.
What are the most straightforward questions to ask when getting to know your date and which subjects are taboo?
Passions and Dreams
This is probably the best question to ask because it is positive and uplifting. Also, it brings an air of support from you to show that you are interested in someone’s passions and not just what they do or what they look like.
Asking about your date’s goals and dreams is sure to make for a warm and personal conversation.
Probing the already familiar
This is the easy one. From the first date, you already know a little about your date. Now, on the second date, it is a great conversation starter to expand on what they had previously shared with you.
This will once more prove your interest and allow you to establish trust for the more personal questions. It will also show that you’re a good listener – a definite brownie point in any relationship!
First date questions about past relationships
Although we all know questions about the ex are taboo on the first date, it might be more acceptable this time around. Especially after expanding more on what you already know.
Asking about past relationships should be the logical next step. After all, knowing how they feel about former romances will show you their emotional state and if they are ready for a new relationship or not.
General questions about their life
Asking about the smaller things in their life is very important since it gives you a glimpse of what their daily lives are all about.
This is an excellent way to get to understand your date’s points of view on certain things and help you spend time on what matters to them.
Should I kiss them on a second date?
The last thing you want in your dating life is a bunch of rules. Still, there are some unspoken guidelines to go by to make sure you don’t overstep any boundaries and mess up any chances of having a relationship.
Once the first get-together is successful, it is usually up to the couple whether they intend to move fast or go at a slow pace.
For the most part, the second date is generally considered early and kissing is always a gamble. Let’s explore some guidelines first.
Hugs are safer to start with
Naturally, a hug is an excellent way to determine whether there is mutual affection when dating.
Still, it can also lead to kissing should both people enjoy the embrace. By embracing your date, you will be able to gauge how comfortable they are with physical interaction.
This, in turn, is a perfect way to preserve boundaries while getting closer to them.
Who knows, you might not have to make that kissing decision and instead, enjoy a pleasant surprise!
Determine your own expectation of dating
You will better measure the intensity of the impending kiss conundrum if you know what you are looking for and what you are comfortable with.
Try to assess little things like chemistry and respectful behavior as you go along because no law says you have to kiss on the second date, or that you’re not allowed to.
Remember, someone who does not respect your decision to kiss or not, may not be the ideal partner and likely not an excellent candidate to continue dating.
Most of all, you shouldn’t let your expectations make your date a tense affair.
It is not a big deal
It is important to remember that a kiss on the second date is not a big deal. No matter how it turns out, if it happens, you shouldn’t hear wedding bells chime and see the words forever after flashing in front of your eyes.
Mostly, a kiss on the second meeting is nothing more than a pleasant flow of things, so do not overthink it.
Many people feel stressed about a kiss because they read too much into it or imagine that it determines the validity of your connection. It is just a kiss. There’s always the third date to get your smooch on.
What should you do on a second date?
Truthfully, the first date was just the initial encounter. Whatever you did or wherever you went is not important, because, in the end, it is all about the chemistry.
Getting your second date is already more reason to be happy that there are a mutual interest and closeness.
However, it is not as important where you go or what you do, as long as it is fun for both of you.
This is where you use what you both have in common to see what you can dish up for a night (or day) of happy abandon. Here are a few suggestions for a good second soiree on your dating journey.
Get some groceries and cook for a night in
Now, before you think this is too close to home for a second date, consider that this is the perfect way to have a relaxing date while getting to know the person you are with.
Doing something together instead of sitting in some restaurant in public, waiting for food may be just the thing.
This is a fun and personal way to spend time together. Even if you are not the best cook, it is the occasion that matters.
Music concerts or local gigs
We all have our favorite bands, and most people find music to be a good way to bond, so take your date to a local show.
After the hopefully not so tedious first date, you should have a good idea of their music tastes.
Not only is a concert or music show a nice way to lean closely in when talking, it’s also a good opportunity to enjoy something together without too much attention on personal space and etiquette. Have some loud fun!
After work fun
Yes, I know it sounds exhausting to have a second date after work, but think about it, it’s a great way to wind down after work while getting to spend some casual time with your favorite person.
Go to a bar for a round of drinks and some snacks or play a game of pool on a weeknight. It might not even feel like an official date and take the stress out of trying to be perfect all the time.
Closing the deal
To wrap it up, it is better to treat the second date as a more casual encounter. Whether there is physical contact or not, it is a certain way to see if you have chemistry with someone on a more emotional level.
Remember to take it easy and not expect too much; you want the person to be comfortable enough to come back.
Read your date’s reactions to your questions and what you share in a more relaxed environment. It might just be the doorway to that third date!