As a general term, longing refers to the feeling of desiring something that you can’t have – at the moment. It’s seen as a burning desire that keeps you thinking how great it’d be to have it.
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Longing for someone, therefore, is to want someone so badly you can’t get your mind off the person.
Feeling a longing for someone can be a positive emotion, but may turn negative if there’s absolutely no possibility of having the person to yourself.
The constant desire and crave for the person (who you’re likely never to have) would drain you of every energy, leaving you hurt, frustrated, and depressed.
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Table of Contents
Longing vs. Missing Someone
There’s a clear line between longing someone and missing them. When you miss someone, your mind feels it, and if often involves the desire for companionship that you can’t have at the moment.
Missing someone is accompanied by the feeling of loneliness, but it’s nothing compared to longing for someone.
Longing for someone drags the entirety of one’s being along. Have you ever felt an emptiness in your body, as though you are lifeless?
That’s what longing does to us. It places our desire for someone above every other need, and until we get what we want, nothing else matters.
How to Differentiate Between Longing and Love
Do you burn with desire for a person you know will never be yours? Are you always dating men that are not just the best fit for you?
Do you constantly tell yourself, for instance, that if you were married to your neighbor’s husband, you’d have more butterflies? Then there’s a chance you’re mixing things up when it comes to longing and love.
Longing has to do with feelings or desires for someone that meets our needs and fantasies. This is entirely different from the love that is real and present.
Longing aches your heart, but love heals it. We easily fall into the trap of longing because someone unavailable often looks more attractive.
We believe that having them in our lives is all we need to be happy, and that’s not too far from a myth.
Love is available, compassionate, and abiding. It doesn’t paint the world as colorful as the fantasies in your head, but it’s always there – holding you, caring for you.
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How to Stop Confusing Longing with Love
Confusing longing with love is a trap many women often fall into. The craving for someone you can’t have at the moment can be so intense you’d think it’s love.
Sometimes, you just wish you could run away with the person and live happily ever after. Not so fast.
Longing, regardless of how strong it is, is fleeting. Love is always there – true and available.
Longing exploits our self-worth to distract us from the real love that is present before us. When we realize that a person can never be ours, it’s imperative to stop fueling the longing for that person.
Would your life indeed be better if Person X was in it? The truth is, you never can tell. It’s better to let go of every fictitious thought and dwell on the love and beauty around you.
We often ignore what is attainable for what’s unrealistic because the latter appears more glamorous.
It’s essential to remember that real love is so dissimilar to the perfect fantasies in our heads.
The fantasies don’t come with ups and downs that are prevalent in true love; they don’t show that a good relationship is often a roller coaster ride.
The Importance of Feeling your Longing For Love
The longing for love is an innate desire, and you shouldn’t feel bad for feeling it. How we respond to this longing for love is what really matters.
Everyone wants to love and be loved: to touch and be touched. Some may choose to live in denial, but it doesn’t quench that burning sensation that is ever-present.
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It’s particularly difficult for strong, independent women to deal with the longing for love. They say, “I don’t need a man to complete me. I am whole”, and so they repress that crave for love. But is that the best thing to do?
We are humans, and our feelings are what define us. Our longing for love will be ever-present, and no one will be able to fulfill that desire.
That’s why it’s important to respond appropriately to our longing for love. Even after you’re married to the “love of your life,” the longing is still going to be there.
Accepting this longing, and staying still with it is a vital step. You realize that the longing isn’t going anywhere, so you accept and live with it.
Sitting still will help you appreciate what is true and what isn’t. You’d know when to respond and who to give your heart to.
FAQs – The Short Answers
What does yearning for someone mean?
It’s a craving to be with someone that you love, but they are either unavailable or far away. The feeling aches, and could make one go ‘crazy.’
Yearning for someone is a feeling of desire for someone you can’t have at the moment.
See Also: Should I Call Him First or Wait for Him to Call?
What is the difference between missing and longing?
When you miss someone, your mind feels it, and it often involves the desire for companionship that you can’t have at the moment.
Missing someone is accompanied by the feeling of loneliness, but it’s nothing compared to longing for someone.
Longing for someone is to want someone so badly you can’t get your mind off the person.
See Also: Subtle Signs She Wants You To Chase Her
How do you use longing in a sentence?
Examples of sentences with longing in it:
- ”She stood by the door, longing for him to hold her by the waist.”
- “More than anything else, the longing consumed her.”
- “Ever since I met him, I’ve not stopped longing for his touch.”
What is the difference between longing and yearning?
The terms longing and yearning are often used interchangeably. They both mean a strong desire (sometimes painful) for something or someone.
