The first date was a hit, and you’re both excited about seeing each other again.
Choosing where to take her on the first date wasn’t that hard, was it?
But now you’re having sleepless nights wondering where to go or what to do for the second date.
What Makes a Great Second Date
It should be social. It won’t be much fun if you sit and quietly read a book in a coffee shop.
Keep it light. Have fun! It’s not “meet the family day”—yet.
Be creative to stand out. If you’re worried about being compared to previous dates, you will have to up your game. Skip the boring dinner and try something exciting.
Keep it broad. Don’t center the date around something unusual that you happen to like. If you’re not sure she’s also into live-action role-playing, don’t take her to such an event.
Leave room for conversation. You want to get to know each other even better, so make sure there is a lot of opportunities to get chatty.
How to Pick a Second Date
Second dates actually have a lot more meaning than we think.
It is the perfect time to find out if there are shared interests, learn about the other person’s goals—basically discover what will knit you two together (if anything).
So, not to apply any more pressure, but what you decide to do on your second date is pretty important.
To help you out, here are some steps to make it easier for you to pick out second date ideas where you two can get to know each other.
1. What are your best qualities? If you can, try to build the second date to showcase these characteristics. Keep in mind that it shouldn’t be something that excludes her.
2. Similarly, if she mentioned some attributes that she thinks make her stand out, why not find an activity to do on your second date that will allow her to shine? If it is a quality you also possess, even better.
3. Consider personalities and insecurities. For example, if you’re an extrovert who can carry a tune, but you know she is the shy reserved type, taking her to a karaoke bar may not be a great idea.
Her evening will be filled with anxiety, and that is the last thing you want if a third date is what you’re after.
4. Selecting an activity where you’re both occupied with something other than focusing solely on each other will make a second date more relaxed. As long as it doesn’t demand too much concentration, you two can make conversation as you go along.
Taking a cooking class together is a great example.
The Dos and Don’ts of Second Dates
There is so much conflicting information regarding dating: the guy should pay—no, split the bill; don’t kiss her on the first date, the second is best—no, don’t kiss her on the second date either…
It doesn’t end. We say forget any of these ‘rules,’ instead, focus on general dating etiquette, which is basically just common human deficiency.
- Don’t expect anything on the second date. Your date may be ready to kiss you, or she may not.
She may be okay with you holding her hand, or she’d prefer to wait until the third date for physical touch.
If you go in without expecting something, you’ll have a better time.
You won’t be disappointed at the end of the second date and will look forward to the third date.
- Don’t fall for the traditional dinner and movie date. It’s not really practical for a second date.
You are still getting to know each other, and watching a movie eats up a whole chunk of time you could’ve spent talking.
Dinner at a restaurant also tends to feel a little too formal. Think of the atmosphere you want on your second date—relaxed is always the way to go for a great time.
- Try something new on the second date. The last thing you want to do is repeat what you did on the first date.
Show them you love having a great time and life with you—should things move to the next level—will be an adventure.
- Keep an open mind. You’re still getting to know each other. If you judge them too quickly, you may end up spoiling something that could have been great.
- Be honest about what you like. You want to impress your date. That is understandable.
The key is to do it by being yourself and not what you want her to think you are.
If you go on a second date that you hate, but you’re doing it to make an impression, you’re shooting yourself in the foot.
Your date will pick up that you’re not enjoying yourself, and they’ll end up internalizing it and think it’s because you don’t like them.
Great Second Date Ideas
The options are endless. You just have to use your imagination to find ideas that will impress her so much on the second date that she can hardly wait for the third date.
Read on for some second date ideas that won’t disappoint.
Free or Less Expensive Second Date Ideas
The chances that you broke the bank on the first date is very likely. After all, we go all out on the first date to impress.
Clearly it was a success since they said yes to a second date. But your bank account isn’t smiling as big as you are.
Now what? If you get creative, you can blow her away without having to pay a cent.
Go to an art museum.
If you know your date loves art, this is a great way to surprise them by taking them to look at some art. A lot of museums have free entrance to exhibits.
Go for a romantic stroll or a hike if you’re both active, outdoorsy types.
There’s nothing quite like fresh air to get the happy hormones flowing. Talk as you walk to get to know each other.
Of course, if you’re unfit and know you’ll spend the whole walk huffing and puffing, maybe rethink this second date idea.
Take her camping—in your own backyard!
On the first date, she told you how much she loves camping, but she never gets the chance to go.
Just imagine how ecstatic she will be if you pitched a tent in your backyard for your second date.
Volunteer at a soup kitchen.
This is an excellent way to bond.
It will also show your date that you’re someone who cares about other people, and this will warm their hearts. It’s a good way to get a third date.
Buy a bunch of seeds and scatter them around town.
What a fun way to spend a second date! Who knows, next year you two can retrace your steps and see the flowers bloom—just like your love.
Look for fun free events in your local newspaper.
Grab the local paper and look for things to do. You both get to circle free events and then randomly select what you’ll do on your second date.
Go to an open house.
Pretend you’re a married couple looking to buy a house.
Role-playing that you two have been together for a while will amplify feelings for sure, and get the imagination going about a possible future together.
Double Date Ideas
If you’re both extroverts who love hanging out in groups, then a double date second date may be just the thing for you.
If your date is introverted, they may prefer a one-on-one setting and will be too anxious to enjoy the second date in a group.
One thing to remember when you opt for a double date is it works best if both of you know someone from the other couple.
One way to make this happen is to set your friends up on a blind date! You both can choose a friend and invite them to get to know each other on a first date.
On the other hand, if you both happen to know a couple from a shared social circle, then ask them to join you.
The fact that they’ve been together for a while may encourage you and your date to find a similar type of intimacy.
Go on a ghost tour.
You know the old trick of taking her to watch a horror movie so that she’ll jump into your arms?
A ghost tour is a step up from that. It will be extra fun with another couple.
Visit an amusement park.
Take her on a scary ride to get her adrenaline pumping. If she’s not brave enough to get on a roller coaster, grab your buddy and leave her and the other girl to have some time to gossip about you two! Going to a carnival is another option.
It is a little more romantic than the adrenaline-pumping wild rides at an amusement park.
You can play cute games to win her a teddy bear and take her on the Ferris wheel—the perfect place for a first kiss. Don’t forget the candyfloss!
Play board games
A lot of the fun board games call for four-plus players.
Since it isn’t just the two of you, now is the ideal time to pull out all the games you want to try.
This second date idea is especially good for rainy days.
Brave a karaoke bar.
Again, only for extroverts, or if your date is shy, put their nerves at ease by telling them they do not have to get up on stage and sing.
Make sure no one else will put pressure on her to do something she doesn’t want to. It is an excellent way to show off your goofy side, or to serenade her with a ballad.
Get on a ferry.
If you live close to water, go on a ferry ride, hire a yacht, or rent a rowboat—anything to get out on the water.
If you want to focus on your date and making a connection, being out on the water will help.
Everyone will forget about their worries and be able to concentrate on the other person. This will raise the bar for future second dates if things don’t work out between you.
Nothing beats some healthy competition. Make sure you and your date are on the same team and can work together to beat the other couple.
This will deepen the bond between you two. It’s also a low-pressure environment where you can have some flirty fun.
Unique Second Date Ideas
We’ve all been on the traditional dinner and a movie date or hitting the bar. Why not switch things up somewhat?
There is a sense of adventure when we’re with someone new. It’s as if we want to awaken parts of ourselves and find out things we never knew.
How daring you’re willing to be is totally up to you—but keep your date in mind.
Attend a rhythmic drumming circle.
If you’re both spiritual and like to explore indigenous cultures while connecting with your inner being, then this will be the perfect second date.
It will most likely also be the first time someone has taken her on such a unique second date.
Listen to a TED talk.
There’s nothing like broadening the mind. Find a topic you’re both interested in and learn more about it together.
If you can listen to a TED talk in real life, even better, but if not, you’ll find tons of good discussions on the Internet.
Clean the beach.
Deepen your bond while caring for the environment. It will most likely be a first for your date.
Get your palms read.
You don’t actually have to believe in the occult to make a palm reading a part of your second date.
It will lead to some thought-provoking conversation nonetheless. You can take a chance and ask about your love life if your date doesn’t believe in psychics.
If she does, it’s best to steer clear of the topic just in case the reading predicts heartbreak.
Go look at some reptiles.
Your date probably hasn’t seen a lot of reptiles up close unless they are hobbyists who have a cold-blooded creature as a pet.
Visiting reptile conventions is a good idea for a second date; she’ll be fascinated or creeped out, which will lead to her clenching your hand just a little tighter.
General Second Date Ideas That Won’t Disappoint
You’ve read this far, but you still haven’t seen any dating ideas you like. Don’t worry, you’ll surely find a second date idea which will make you go, “Aha! That’s the one,” below.
Go horseback riding.
If not either of you knows how to ride a horse, sign up for a class. Learning a new skill together is a great way to get to know a person.
And, it is such an out-of-the-box idea, that she’ll remember it forever—even if you two don’t make it as a couple.
Cook dinner together.
If you want a super relaxed atmosphere, this is the date for you. It’s ideal for two foodies to enjoy home-made culinary masterpieces together.
Why don’t you make the main dish and ask your date to take care of dessert? To score extra brownie points, you can offer to do the dishes.
Visit a rock climbing gym.
You’ll have to consider your date and your fitness levels if you plan on choosing this as your second date.
However, if you’re both fitness freaks, then you’re in the clear. It will more than likely be so much fun that a third date will happen sooner rather than later.
Start a mini film festival.
This one is for the movie buffs out there. You can choose two movies (or more) and discuss each film afterward.
You’ll get to sit closely next to each other and since you’re leaving room for discussion after each film, you’ll still get to know your date.
Visit a bookstore.
If you’ve met a fellow bookworm, there is no better place to get to know your date. The type of books they enjoy says a lot about their personality.
Maybe find a book that you both like and take turns reading from it to each other.
Go to trivia night at a bar.
Show off your general knowledge—but only if trivia is something your date will enjoy too. You and your date can work together to beat all the other couples.
This second date is a great way to find out if you’re a match intelligence wise. It will also give you some idea of what activities to plan for the third date.
A lot of couples in romantic movies go bowling, so it must be one of the better second date ideas out there.
Right? We agree. It’s fun. Also, you can always get close to her by helping her with her bowling stance.
Second Date Tips
Now that you have some great second date ideas to choose from, here are some tips for leaving them wanting more.
Flirting is Okay
You can loosen up somewhat. On the first date, you were treading lightly and probably kept the flirting to a minimum.
Turn up the charm a little on the second date. Compliment your day, hold eye-contact for a little longer, playfully touch their arm—just keep it respectful.
Remember to read their body language to see if they’re uncomfortable if you get too touchy-feely.
This can be hard, especially since going on a date can be nerve-wracking, which may lead to you questioning yourself constantly.
Keep in mind that your date likes you; otherwise, they would not have agreed to see you again.
This already should give you a confidence boost that will carry you through the second date.
Of course, this doesn’t mean you should get cocky. It’s never a good idea to get too comfortable too soon.
Show You Listen
Hopefully, you memorized some of the things your date told you when you went out the first time. Bring this up on your second date.
Ask her how she did in her exam, or if she made it through that boring big meeting. Showing her that you remember what she said will go a long way.
Ask More Questions
On the first date, there are questions you probably didn’t get to ask; now is the time to cover these.
Be careful not to fish for information that is too personal. Asking your date where their parents live, if they have siblings, what they enjoy about their job are all good options. But be careful not to turn your second date into an interview!
What About a Third Date?
If you feel the time is right, find out if she’d like to go on a third date. It’s a bold move, but if you read the signs correctly, then it is appropriate.
Other than that, just relax and have fun!